Stafford Marriage & Family Counseling

Lynne Head, Board Certified Therapist

Courageous Couples!

I feel humbly honored by the thousands of courageous couples who have allowed me to witness their most personal struggles in their attempt to create a more passionate marriage. Creating a passionate marriage will probably cost you. Progress and personal growth always do present a challenge.

If you decide to pursue sex therapy, you’ll be looking into the very heart of your personal reality. The one thing we want the most (intimacy with another person) is the one thing that we most fear. We are afraid that if we ever really allow ourselves to be completely vulnerable with the one we say we love, we might lose that person; and we wonder if we could survive that loss. So, we hold back who we really are as a defense from the possible loss.

Please be patient with yourself and allow yourself to be open. If you find yourself needing help, or just another perspective, please call me for an appointment.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

Dealing With an Unfaithful Spouse

The violation of trust in your marriage as the result of an affair can be positively devastating physically, emotionally, psychologically, sexually, and morally. There are very effective ways to heal the pain and rebuild the trust when a partner has betrayed the marital relationship. In fact, in my 29 years of being a therapist, what I’ve noticed is that when the betrayal has been discussed openly and honestly, and the couples work together to resolve the precipitants for the unfaithful act, couples can blossom in a powerful way.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

What Does Your Family Look Like?

What does a Normal Family look like? Jane Howard says, “Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.”

When I lived in Dallas, I met some of the best family therapists in this country. There are basically fifteen traits common in what we could call Healthy families according to my colleague, Delores Curran. During the next few blogs, we will review these traits. Peter Collier once said, “Your family is what you’ve got…” It’s your limits and your possibilities. Sometimes you’ll get so far away from your family, you’ll think you’re outside its influence forever; then before you figure out what’s happening, it will be right beside you, pulling the strings. Some people get crushed by their families. Others are saved by them.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

Self Esteem

Red PaintRepaint your life to find your self esteem.

We are born with perfect self esteem.

From birth, circumstances occur which undermine how we value ourselves. The six things which force voids in how we think and feel about ourselves are:

  • Early childhood loss.
  • Caretaker abuse.
  • Caretaker neglect.
  • Caretaker over protectiveness.
  • Caretaker overindulgence.
  • Caretaker drug or alcohol abuse/dependency/addictions.

Red PaintRepaint your life to find your self esteem. We will either fill these voids with Ego (drugs, binge drinking, food, relationships, materialism, power, control, academia, work, caffeine, nicotine, shopping, gambling, etc.) or we will rediscover our original self value by modifying our beliefs about ourselves.

Please know you are one-of-a-kind, unique, exclusive, no one else is just like you or has experienced your life. Imagine how we might change ourselves by the thoughts we have of ourselves. Start your autobiography today and begin reframing every thought about yourself that does not work in your life.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

Become Your Own Best Friend

Becoming your own best friend can be so much harder than it sounds. If you think about it, we are born with perfect self esteem. As tiny babies, all of our needs are automatically met by our parents. Then, as we begin to grow, some of that good healthy self esteem is trained out of us by our caretakers.

There are basically six things which occur during our formative years which cause us to become extremely self critical, and then suddenly we become our worst enemy instead of our best friend. One of the most detrimental occurrences is any type of early childhood loss. These losses can be anything from a death, a divorce, a move, not being invited to another child’s party, being told you should be ashamed of yourself, you’re a bad child, etc.

Working in therapy can begin to eliminate these voids in how we value ourselves. Now may be the time to give yourself the gift of being your own best friend.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

When Divorce is Inevitable

Divorce can be a very painful, confusing, and traumatic process that negatively affects the entire family. Although I am a huge proponent of working through the problems in a marriage, if the contempt in your marriage has grown to the point of divorce, please consider divorce therapy. Divorce therapy can provide enhanced understanding of the divorce process, which includes communication skills, relational skills, co-parenting skills, and transitional knowledge.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

Empower Yourself

Someone else’s opinion of you is none of your business.

I don’t know about you but one of my Mom’s favorite things to say was, “What would the neighbors think?” The little girl in me made that question mean that my worth depended on what other people thought of me.

I became a chameleon. Instead of just being myself, I became the person everybody else wanted me to be. For years, until I found a really good therapist, I lost myself. Therapy helped me feel more confident and empowered.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

Systemic Family Therapy

Frequently, I will receive a referral from another therapist when they have been asked to see a second member of the same family. A Systemically trained therapist would not do that. During my 2000 hour internship, my training was focused on helping the entire system, which means helping the entire family and the dynamics in that family.

When we are in a family, every behavior one member of the family participates in effects all of the other family members. When parents expect to drop off a young person with a therapist without recognizing the importance of actively participating themselves, they are exhibiting what might be considered an unrealistic expectation of success. A good therapist can help a young person develop some healthy social skills, but the most important success will be evident when the therapist and the parents are reinforcing an agreed-upon set of structures for the family setting.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

Parenting Skills are Changing

During the last decade over-parenting has gotten way out of control, according to some experts. Parents have been so obsessed with their children’s success and their safety that they have moved into over-protectiveness and overinvestment in their children’s lives. When we infantilize and rescue our children from the consequences of their own choices our children develop increased anxiety, and feelings of low self worth. When we give our children fewer choices and more consistent limits we empower our children instead of disempowering them.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]

Married With Children?

Are you married with children?

Dad, the greatest gift you can give your children is to love their Mom.

Mom, the greatest gift you can give your children is to love their Dad.

Honor your vows, be a person of integrity.

[Lynne Head is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in marriages, relationships, and individual counseling. Located in Stafford, VA, Lynne can be reached by phone at 214-502-9081, or by email. For more information, see her website at: www.StaffordMarriageFamilyCounseling.com]
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